FAQs: Can I hire you to work with my adult daughter/mom/friend?
One of the top three responses I get when I tell someone that I am a Professional Organizer is something about how much a friend or family member (or themselves) needs my services. Along with getting this response come the phone calls and email inquiries asking if I can be hired to work with their adult daughter or mother or close friend or neighbor. While it is incredibly thoughtful of these people to want their loved ones to experience peace and freedom in their homes, I always have the same answer. “I am happy to work with them when they are ready. Please send them to my website so they can see what service I provide. When they are ready, they can reach out and we can discuss their goals for their spaces.”
The reasons I won’t show up at someone’s house uninvited are two-fold.
I only work side-by-side with my clients. It is impossible for me to know what is one person’s trash or treasure unless I have their direct input. I also cannot put systems in place to maintain their treasures without knowing how they go about their days.
If someone is not ready to give direct input on what stays in or leaves their home (or later, where it will live) they may resent the person who recommended it or the process of decluttering and organizing altogether. This also results in systems not being maintained and likely will end in a worse state of chaos than they started with.
One caveat is that I do work with teens and children whose parents reach out. However, the same rule applies, if they aren’t ready, it will be drudgery and some resentment might be involved making it more difficult to maintain or try again in the future.
What can you do if you want your friend or loved one to benefit from decluttering and organizing services?
Be kind. Did you know that not everyone has the same clutter threshold? You’ve heard of a the pain threshold, right? Same idea. Some people can tolerate more clutter than others. So while you may not like the amount of clutter in your mom/friend/sister/etc’s house, they may not mind it at all.
Communicate. Does the clutter affect you? Is the clutter in your home? Have kind conversations with that person about how you feel in the space. Sometimes talking about it will reveal their similar feelings about the space as well.
Model. Do what you can with your own things - declutter and organizing and maintain systems. This modeling often goes a long way.
Recommend. “You know, I read this quote recently…” “A friend of mine has been working with a professional organizer. I didn’t even know that was a thing, did you?” These are just ideas. Be genuine with your own conversation.
Be patient. One conversation probably won’t bring that person around right away. And neither will nagging - whether implicitly or explicitly.
Summary on FAQ page:
FAQs: Can I hire you to work with my adult daughter/mom/friend?
How thoughtful of you to want peace and freedom for someone you love! You are more than welcome to recommend my services, send them to the website, and when they are ready they can reach out to me so we can discuss their goals for their spaces. While you may be ready for their space to be less chaotic, they might not mind at all and until they are ready, it won’t be helpful.